A Family's Guide to Memorizing Scripture and Growing Together in Faith

Memorizing Scripture is an essential part of a person's faith journey. Knowing scripture helps us fight spiritual battles by guarding our hearts, guarding our minds, and by helping us keep our thoughts and actions aligned with God's truth. Even during seasons of depression, anxiety, or when we question our self-worth, scripture reminds us where we find our strength and purpose - in Jesus Christ! In times of grief or uncertainty, memorizing scripture also helps us remember that God is our source of peace that surpasses all understanding. Only He has the power to take away our worries and replace them with peace and reassurance.

My family started practicing memory verses when my son started preschool. The teachers at his school would come up with a memory verse to practice as a class each month and the class would recite it together daily and read about it in the Bible. Our son was so excited about his ability to memorize scripture that he’d walk into the office at the end of the day to recite his verse and earn a sticker! So, to encourage him and his love for God's word, we started memorizing it at home as a family. When he left preschool and started kindergarten at our local public school, we implemented our own memory verse of the month as a way to continue his, and ours, spiritual growth.

When we are confident in our knowledge of Scripture, we are more prepared to share God’s truth with others, helping to create new believers and grow His kingdom. To put it simply, memorizing Scripture not only strengthens our own faith, but also empowers us to be effective witnesses of God’s love and truth in the world.

I encourage your family to start memorizing scripture together! Reading and knowing God's word lays a firm foundation for a lifelong journey of faith not only in yourself, but your family and friends as well. When children learn Bible verses early on, they start to internalize God’s truth earlier in their lives. This helps shape their character and guide their choices and actions as they grow into adults. Knowing God's word can also give children (and adults) a sense of security and confidence, knowing they can turn to God’s Word for comfort and wisdom in any situation. As your family grows both physically and spiritually, the verses they've memorized will be a source of strength and peace. By planting these “seeds” of truth early, you are helping ensure that their faith is deeply rooted and capable of withstanding life's storms.

Here are 10 different verses that are short, but impactful, and easy for family members of all ages to memorize:

(These verses were sourced from various translations of the Bible)

1. 1 Peter 5:7 - Give all your worries to Him because He cares for you.

2. Proverbs 17:17 - A friend loves you all the time. 

3. Psalm 56:3 - When I am afraid, I put my trust in you.

4. Ephesians 4:32 - Be kind to one another.

5. John 3:16 - For God so loved the world that He gave His one and only son. 

6. Matthew 4:19 - “Come and follow me”, Jesus said.

7. Psalm 150:6 - Let everything that breathes praise the Lord.

8. Proverbs 16:24 - Pleasant words are like honeycomb. They make a person happy and healthy. 

9. Proverbs 4:23 - Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it.

10. Colossians 3:23 - Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for human masters.

And for fun, here is a bonus verse for parents to teach their children: 

Ephesians 6:1 - Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. 

I recognize that memorizing scripture is sometimes easier said than done. So I want to provide you with 5 tips to help you memorize scripture:

• Start small. Don’t feel like you need to memorize a full chapter of the Bible. There are plenty of short verses that are impactful, maybe start there! 

• Put hand motions to the words. Here is an example of what hand motions for Matthew 4:19 might look like: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oXq2IhZdlX4 

• Write the verse on a piece of paper and put it somewhere where you will see it often. This may be on a post-it note at your desk, a note stuck on the side of the fridge, or a sign hanging next to the front door so you see it every day on your way to work and school. 

• Say the verse out loud 2 times a day with a family member or a friend. 

• Sing the words of the verse to the rhythm of a song that you enjoy. 

I hope you found this blog insightful, helpful, and that you feel encouraged to impress the word of God on your heart and the hearts of those you love.

For more content related to faith, family and everything in between, Follow Rock Solid Families on social media and check out the Rock Solid Families Podcast on YouTube, Spotify, and Apple Podcasts. 

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Do parents have the right to look through their kids phone?

“Do you think my parents should be allowed to snoop through my phone?”

This was a question Linda Hutchinson, Executive Director of Rock Solid Families, overheard at her local swimming pool. Three teenage girls carried on about how parents shouldn’t be allowed to go through their phones and “snoop” into their private lives. One even jokingly said it should be illegal and that they should call the police on their parents.

But the question still remains, do parents have the right to look at their kids’ phones? In short, the answer is yes. Let me explain…

The way of the world has shifted and parents have created an equal level of authority between them and their children. This often is caused by wanting to be the “cool” parents, or because parents don’t want to hurt their children’s feelings. This has led to many kids having free reign when it comes to using digital devices.

There are three questions parents can ask themselves to find the correct answer to the “Do we have the right to look at their phone” question...

1.) Do we, the parents, own the phone / pay the bill?

2.) Does the child live in our home?

3.) Is the child a minor? (Under the age of 18.)

If you answered “yes” to any of those questions, then the answer is simple: Yes - you have the right and the responsibility to monitor your child’s digital device, whether its a phone, gaming console, smart TV, or iPad. All of these devices were mentioned because believe it or not, your children have full access to the internet through many devices, not just phones and computers.

Below are four different ways that as parents, you can help guide your family and children down the right path in a digitally crazed world.

1.) Be clear about what digital devices you will allow in your home:

As mentioned, there are many ways that children can access the World Wide Web. iPads, phones, computers, Xbox/PlayStation, and even Google and Alexa devices all grant users full access to the internet, bad content, strangers from around the world and so much more. Limiting devices will help parents better monitor their child’s digital use.

2.) Parents need to be on the same page when it comes to the level of access and freedom when allowing children to use digital devices.

Even if you are divorced, discussing the use and access that children have on digital devices should be done privately before setting the rules with the children. Parents being on the same page eliminates the chance of the child putting you against each other because “well dad said I could …”. (have social media, use this website, play online gaming… etc.) If expectations are clear among the whole house, or even across two households, it creates unity among the parents, the children, and the whole family unit.

Some great resources for helping families set boundaries on digital devices can be found on the Protect Young Eyes website, as well as the Wait Until 8th website.

3.) Enforce the rules you set.

You’ve already established what devices are acceptable, and set up clear boundaries regarding the level of access when your child uses the devices, so now it’s time for parents to be parents and enforce the rules. Let your children know that if expectations and trust are broken, there will be consequences. For example, if they aren’t allowed to have social media, but make an account anyway, maybe the consequence is taking away devices. It may cause an undesirable reaction from your child, but it is important to stick to your rules! If we waiver and don’t enforce the rules, they won’t be taken seriously.

4.) Establish screen free time and tech-free zones.

This will look different for each family, but some examples are no phones at the dinner table, no devices in bedrooms after 8:00 pm, tech-free family movie nights, etc. Parents, this does not only apply to the kids. Lead by example and follow your expectations. If they see you taking it seriously, they are more likely to see the importance of this time as well. Use this to connect with your children without any distractions present.

A great book to read that dives deeper into the dangers of screen time and the benefits of a screen-free world (or at least reduced screen time) is by author Jonathan Haidt, called The Anxious Generation. This book discusses the over-parenting and under-parenting that has led to a whole generation of anxious children, with a lot of research on the impact of screen time.

Parents, no matter where you are in your parenting journey, it is not too late. Step up and be the parents God designed you to be and the parents your kids need you to be. Don’t let them miss out on fun, making memories, learning, connecting, and growing because they are distracted by a screen. It is your responsibility to monitor digital devices that are putting your kids in potential danger. Surround yourself with other parents who align with your rules and expectations - it’s always easier to go through parenthood when you are part of a supportive community.

For more content on the topics of faith, family, fitness, and everything in between, subscribe to the Rock Solid Families Podcast on YouTube, Spotify, or Apple Podcast.

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Are We Teaching Our Kids to be Consumers or Producers?

We are all naturally both a consumer and a producer, but our mindset determines what energy we put back into the world around us - Are we a giver or a taker? It is easy to be consumer-minded with all of the instant gratification and access to all sorts of resources at our fingertips. (Think Amazon same day or next day delivery…talk about on-demand! )

Our kids are also experiencing this commercialized consumer mindset. They tend to demand more and more as they get older, trying to stay on top of the trendiest shoes and clothing, “needing” a new car on their sixteenth birthday, wanting more freedom, and the list goes on. But what they don’t always think about is that these demands and freedoms come with having more responsibilities. By giving in to our children’s every demand and desire, we are encouraging a consumer mindset, avoiding their responsibilities, and setting them up for failure.

As parents, it is our job to help them understand what is involved with their wants and needs. How much something costs, the time needed to make it happen, necessary resources, etc. This teaching should start in the leadership season of parenting, when children are between the ages of 3 - 13, and be reinforced during the mentoring season (Ages 13-18).

In episode # 288 of the Rock Solid Families Podcast, Merrill and Linda Hutchinson provide us with 10 simple ways we can ensure we are raising producers (givers/servers) and not consumers (takers).

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1.) Make sure you are unified as parents.
It is important to be on the same page as your spouse and make sure that the family values are established. Oftentimes kids will try to put mom and dad against each other, and when it falters, it can lead to resentment between parents and becomes more of a marital issue than a parenting issue.

2.) State what you want for your kids.
Not in the current moment, but in the long run. Who do you want them to be when they are around the age of 18-21? What do you want them to be like?

3.) Teach them the importance of contributing to the family.
Whether it is doing daily or weekly chores, helping set up or clean up the dinner table, or attending family outings or activities. Family comes first and its beneficial to reflect on how their actions affect the family as a whole - is it impactful or hurtful?

4.) Let your kids know the cost of things that they consume and what it takes for you to provide those things.
Don’t use this to guilt them or when you have given something or done something as a gift. Instead, use this to teach them the cost of items in terms of hours of work or time spent to achieve the goal.

5.) Encourage opportunities for them to be responsible.
Simple chores offer opportunities for children to be held responsible and are a great way to start contributing to the greater good of the family unit. Whether it is feeding the dog, taking out the trash, doing the dishes, or cleaning their rooms, it helps them see the world outside of themselves, and how what they do impacts not just themselves, but others around them.

6.) Teach them to serve and give while using their time, talents, and treasures.
Serving others with your time and talents helps create leaders! If you aren’t sure what your gifts or talents are, you can take this spiritual gifts assessment and it will provide you with ways that you might enjoy or excel at while serving others.

7.) Teach them to appreciate the things they have.
We can’t expect our children to naturally have an appreciation for the things they have. We need to teach them to appreciate their things by taking care of our stuff and being thankful. This can be taught by making sure they have some investment in the things they have. This could look like them saving up to help pay for an expensive electronic they really want, cleaning their car (inside and out!), or cleaning up and selling that dirt bike they just HAD to have 2 months after buying it because it wasn’t as fun as they thought it would be.

8.) Don’t do things for them that they are capable of doing themselves - Yes, I’m talking to you too, Moms!
It’s so easy to fall into this trap of doing things for our children because it’ll get done quicker, it’ll get done correctly, and it will get done the first time we ask. But children are usually capable of doing more than we think. I challenge you to stretch what you think they are capable of and then ask them to do it. If we do everything for them, they won’t learn to do things for themselves and will be stuck in this consumer mindset thinking that “someone else will do it.” or “its not my job to do that.”

9.) Give them examples of people who have chosen a dominant life as consumers as well as those who have chosen to be producers.
The story of Elvis Presley comes to mind on this one. On the outside, he seemed to have it all together - he had the fame and the fortune. He was well-known and well-liked by his fans but behind the scenes, he was narcissistic and rude to his staff and crew. Turns out, he grew up poor and with an overprotective mom who did everything for him as a way of her coping with the loss of another child.

10.) Let them know that you did not invent this function of parenting.  It was invented by Christ!
Mark 10:45 says, “For even the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for man.” It is God’s will for us to live a life like Jesus and for Jesus. Jesus was the perfect example of how we should live, and if he lived to serve others, we should too!

Click HERE to watch the full episode from Rock Solid Families on raising producers verses consumer.

For more content on topics of faith, family and fitness, subscribe to Rock Solid Families Podcast on youtube or listen on apple podcast and spotify.

How to Parent Through Excessive Complaining.

In the Bible, Philippians 2: 14-15 says “Do everything without grumbling or arguing so that you may become blameless and pure children of God without fault in a warped and crooked generation. Then you will shine among them like stars in the sky.”

I think most of us have experienced when our child has one of those days where they are quick to grumble or tell us about every ache or pain they are experiencing. When they are telling you about the aches and pains they are experiencing, it is with such emotion that you wonder how they are even living through it. Five minutes later, you hear laughing and playing outside and you see that same child playing with their friends outside having what seems to be a pain-free time.

Parents today often ask, “So, when should I take my child seriously and when should I go tone deaf or even dismissive of their complaints?” Some modern counselors will tell you that you should never dismiss your child’s complaints, rather, you should validate their complaints. However, the proof is out on this one - sometimes our kids need to know their irrational complaints need to be shut down sooner rather than later and that it is okay to say “NO” to your kids. Someday they may even thank you.

In Episode # 283 of the Rock Solid Families Podcast, Merrill and Linda discuss how to navigate a child’s excessive complaining. However, this episode is not just limited to children. This idea of how to deal with complainers respectfully is common in so many places - work, school, church, etc. Rock Solid Families wants to tackle this topic because it primarily relates to the home and is the first training step to helping our children recognize and deal more appropriately with their own complaints.

Chronic complainers we interact with in life are typically people who have practiced the act of complaining for a long time. Somehow they seem to believe they were successful with this strategy in the past and keep doing it. However, as we talk about how to deal with the complaints of our children, we want to first lay out a few disclaimers and understandings:

You must handle their complaints appropriately for the season they are in. Remember the seasons:
(Click each link below to listen to our podcast episodes on the different seasons of parenting.)

Season 1: Service 0 - 2 yrs - Service Years
Season 2: Leadership 3-13 yrs - Leadership Years
Season 3: Mentoring 13-18/21 yrs - Mentorship Years
Bonus season: Friend and Counsel 21+ - Emancipation Years

If you have a child in the first season, 0-2 years of age, you never dismiss their cries. In the second season - Leadership, 3-13 years of age, this is where the training takes place to help your kids learn the language of how to express what the emotions are behind the complaint. Early in this season, you can help them by teaching them the actual words of the emotion - “Are you feeling angry? Sad? Tired?…. DO NOT GET INTO THE HABIT OF BEING THE RESCUE PARENT - THEY ARE NO LONGER IN SEASON 1.

Begin to teach your child how to problem solve by teaching them how to ask better questions. “What can I do about my complaint?” Later in Season 2 about ages 8-13, if you’re child leans towards the chronic complainer side, teach them PERSPECTIVE. This is where they can begin to look at life through other people’s eyes. It is also the initial way of learning of EMPATHY for others.

Hear more about parenting through the excessive complaining by listening to our podcast at the link below: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vaxk6U4SLRM&t=1459s

http://rocksolidfamilies.org