Hitting the Wall

Have you ever “hit a wall” when you physically or emotionally couldn’t do it anymore? Maybe, you came to the end of yourself where you “hit rock bottom” and needed to make a change in your life? Both were the case for 21 year old Monica this past winter, when she hit more than the proverbial wall. In February 2021, it took a large retaining wall, a totaled car and a DUI to finally get Monica’s attention.

Numbing the Pain
Monica admits she had been living pretty angrily and recklessly up until the accident. As a teen, Monica was a girl with an attitude. She would regularly smoke marijuana and drink alcohol trying to numb the pain and loss she was feeling inside. Monica was an angry teenager that dumped a lot of hate and judgement on anyone who crossed her.  Looking back, Monica now realizes the marijuana, alcohol, anger, and tough exterior were all feeble attempts to cover up the feelings of abandonment and unforgiveness after her parents’ divorce. Instead of getting help, Monica self medicated and ignored the warning signs.

Healing Begins
That was until the accident got her attention. Getting a DUI and losing her license definitely humbled Monica and opened her eyes. She finally realized she needed help dealing with the emotions she had stuffed for so long. That’s when Monica made the call to Rock Solid Families and began the healing process. 

Let’s Be Honest
What about you? Are you turning to alcohol, drugs or hate to cover up pain or loss? Are you numbing or stuffing difficult feelings of anger, abandonment, betrayal instead of dealing with them in a healthy way? Let’s be honest. You’re not really getting high just because it feels good. You’re not drinking every day just because you’re bored. You’re not lashing out at everyone around you because it’s fun. What’s really going on inside? Stop kicking that proverbial can down the road. It’s only going to lead to destruction whether it be your marriage, your job, or maybe even your life.  There is HOPE and HELP available, but it’s not going to be found in the bottom of a bottle. It’s not going to be found in secrets and isolation. The enemy loves it when we keep things in the dark. He can hold us captive in our shame and pain. 

Get Rid Of The Garbage
Pick up that garbage and throw it in its proper place. Get help today and experience a peace and freedom like you’ve never experienced before. Get involved in a 12 step program like Celebrate Recovery or AA, if you need help in breaking free from addiction. Find someone to help hold you accountable for the changes you know you need to make. That’s what Monica did, and she’ll be the first one to tell you. It’s so worth it!

Click HERE to listen to Episode 155 Rock Solid Radio, Learning the Hard Way with Special Guest, Monica Quintanilla

Click HERE to watch Episode 155 Rock Solid Radio, Learning the Hard Way with Special Guest Monica Quintanilla

Do You Want to Get Well?

Since opening our Rock Solid Families office over two years ago, we have had the privilege of working with hundreds and hundreds of individuals, couples and families. Every day, we see clients who are hurting physically, emotionally, and spiritually. Sometimes, it's from their own choices like addiction or infidelity. Other times, it’s at the hands of someone else who has left them feeling abused or abandoned. In many instances, our clients come in feeling paralyzed and unable to see any good that could come from their struggle.

One of our goals in our faith based coaching is to help clients see that there is HELP and HOPE available. It’s promised in his word that in ALL things God works for the good of those who love him and have been called according to his purpose, (Romans 8:28) but for many clients, that truth is hard to fathom. It’s hard to imagine anything good coming out of their pain and tears. Some have been dealing with their past trauma or living as a victim for so long, their pain has almost become part of the family. 

That was the case for a lame man back in Jesus’ day who was lying by a healing pool in Bethesda. The pool from time to time would stir as the angel of the Lord came and healed whoever made it in first. This particular man had been paralyzed for 38 years and when Jesus met him by the pool,  he had been there for a very long time waiting for someone to help. Can you imagine?  In John 5, we see Jesus coming on the scene asking the lame man the all important question, “DO YOU WANT TO GET WELL?”  The invalid replied, “I have no one to help me into the pool when the water is stirred. While I am trying to get in, someone else goes down ahead of me.” 

Aren’t we a lot like that lame man in Jesus’ day? I know I can be at times. There are days I just want to sit there with my “victim” badge and cry “Someone, anyone, please feel sorry for me! It’s a lot easier to wallow in my circumstances and sit in my pain than do the work to change my situation. It would almost be like losing a little piece of my identity. The invalid had excuse after excuse for Jesus why he hadn’t gone in that water to be healed.  It had been 38 years, for goodness sake! You’d think that would be motivation enough to crawl or beg your way to the pool and be healed.

What about you? How long are you going to wear your “victim” badge? After all, everyone’s got something. Maybe you experienced abuse as a child or were bullied in school. Maybe, you struggle to this day with an addiction or learning disability. Maybe you are like many of our clients who have made some really bad decisions in the past and are still reeling from the natural consequences of their choices. That “ailment” doesn’t have to define you. You don’t have to be “lame” or “blind” forever. Jesus Christ asks us the same question he asked the paralyzed man by the pool-”Do YOU want to get well?” And he extends the same offer of hope and healing to us today. 

Choosing to pursue healthy and healing is not only important personally, but it’s also critical as a parent. What are our children seeing in us-victim or victory? I ask my clients who are also parents that question all the time. We are raising too many victims in our world today. “It’s not my fault” or “No one will help me” are only excuses that perpetuate victimhood. Let’s not let ourselves play the blame game any longer. It’s time to search our hearts and ask ourselves the all important question-”Do I want to get well?” Then, in faith, let’s pick up our mats and start walking.