This past weekend we helped lead a marriage enrichment weekend with an amazing group of married couples from our local area. It was so encouraging seeing couples there married more than 40-50 years as well as just a year or two. There were couples representing first marriages, second marriages, blended families, you name it. It was truly a melting pot. We laughed together, prayed together, and grew together. We were encouraged to see so many men and women wanting to strengthen and protect their marriage and family. In our time together, we shared with them the secret weapon to do both.
The Secret Weapon
Do you want peace, power, and protection for your marriage and family? Do you want the secret weapon in preventing divorce with over 99% effectiveness? Then pray together! Yep, that’s right. Less than ONE PERCENT of couples who pray together on a regular basis divorce. I don’t know of any tool that can rival that statistic, but unfortunately not many are tapping into the power. Family Life surveyed thousands of Christian couples and found a sad and alarming statistic. You’ve probably heard one out of every two marriages end in divorce, but have you heard the statistic isn’t any better for Christian couples? Why is that? Maybe it’s because only 4% of Christian couples actually pray together on a regular basis.
Helping You Get Started
Why don’t more couples pray together? Every couple is different, but here are some suggestions that may help you get started:
BE POSITIVE- No throwing your spouse under the bus. Thank God out loud for your partner. Pray blessings and protection over your family. Focus on why you love them and thank God for them. It will fill the heart of your spouse and draw you closer to the Lord and each other.
BE BRIEF- Keep it simple and to the point. Make sure whatever routine you begin you can sustain. It’s not the time to show off your big vocabulary and flowery prayers. You want your spouse to feel comfortable with you praying out loud.
BE CONSISTENT - Find a daily time that works with you both and stick to it. Consistency is important but so is flexibility. If your schedule gets crazy and you have to mix it up, no worries. There are no rules.
BE TRANSPARENT- Don’t be afraid to share your heart with God in front of your spouse. Praying out loud alongside your spouse builds spiritual intimacy and creates a bond that cannot be easily broken. A mealtime prayer is always a great family practice, but it isn’t exactly the best time to build intimacy or transparency. You need time and privacy as a couple not a growling belly worried the food is getting cold.
BE PATIENT- Building spiritual intimacy takes time, but it is so worth it. God can do beautiful things with folks who seek Him above all else.
Seeing Into Your Partner’s Heart
So there you have it. My top five suggestions for praying together as a couple. After hearing those startling statistics mentioned above almost 20 years ago, my husband and I began praying together almost every evening before bed. I’ll admit. It was awkward at first. We were used to praying rote prayers as a family not heartfelt ones out loud privately. As the spiritual leader in our home, my husband goes first and prays for me, our marriage, our family and anything else laying on his heart that day. Then I do the same. Often, we’ll share things in that prayer time we haven’t mentioned all day. It’s like seeing into the heart of my spouse. It’s also hard to harbor negative feelings and unresolved issues when we’re praying together on a regular basis.
So why not grab your spouse and start today? What do you have to lose? It may just be the tie that binds you together and draws you closer to each other and to the Lord.
Though one may be overpowered,
two can defend themselves.
A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.
Ecc. 4:12
Click HERE to watch Episode 159 of Rock Solid Radio, Why Should I Pray?
Click HERE to listen to Episode 159 of Rock Solid Radio, Why Should I Pray?